The born of 2010

2009 really means alot to me. Obviously I saying this year. I got to know a bunch of new friends and I had fall in love to a person. I had go through my public examination and my ABRSM exam. I I cracked many jokes in the class. All those things I already been through and learn from mistakes. This year is the year that give me a lot unforgettable memories with you. I started to go out with my schoolmates this year. Everything had already past. This year make me realize that you're really very important for me. The god had granted me tears because of you. This year do have some bad memories in between friends. But I not going to remember that. I will only remember all those good memories that granted to me. I will really appreciate that. Because friends is really important for me. At the same time, you're the most important for me. I want to share the rest of my life with you.

5 more hours to go.

After this 5 hours, we had know each other for 1 years and the half..

I love you.

I miss you, Ruby Teo

Time passes very slow without you. Today I going to medical check-up. I want to see you. Still got 6 days to go. This 6 days really passes very slow. I don't really know what to do right now. You just like a stardust. You have the magical and charismatic quality. You always the charming one in my heart. Nobody can take over your place in my heart. No subsitute for you. You're the best for me. No matter how you become, my heart still with you. I don't care how people said about me. I just want to be with you.

I miss you, Ruby Teo..

Merry Christmas

Today I went to Sunway Lagoon with my friends. Is just only few of us but I do have a lot of fun with you even though is just a few hours. But last night I really exhausted. I enjoying protecting you. I won't let anyone to hurt you. I had make you disappointed again. Because I can't give you the lovely monkey to you. I promised you that I going to buy you a very cute monkey or teddy bear for you all the way from Japan. And I will find you if I have free time. Don't worry. Yesterday before I leave you, I saw the sadness in you. But you gave me a nice memories that is the red spots at my hand. And a nice slap from you. Even though it sounds hurt. As long as you feels happy after you doing that, is worth. I rather myself feels the pain but I don't want you to be sad. I will always be there with you if you need me.

I love you, Ruby Teo.

Ending of the story...

I had decided to give up. So everything is over. I won't feels regret with my decision. Is time to let it go. I won't invest any time or effort in this anymore. This few years I will try my best not to fall in love at anyone else because it is torturing me. Just let it come naturally. Things like that can't be forced. I trying my very best to put all these things down. So that's it.

The End...

Farewell

I guess I need to say good-bye to some of my friends who go overseas to further their studies. I think I should further my studies at overseas and not coming back here. Should I? I don't really like the climate at Malaysia because it is extremely hot. I love all those country with 4 seasons. It is truly awesome and many events are offer to all the citizens. I wanna go Lancelin now with my friends to play sand boarding. But the weather is very hot. Apart from that, Malaysia had leave me many precious moments with my dearest friends and lovely classmates. Anyway, take care, my friends.

Good-bye..

Time is my chance

I really did not ready when you gave me that answer. But I'm so sorry that I still can't let it go. This is because I haven't prove it to you. I wanna prove it to you what you said is totally meaningless. And you very sure that I did not dare to do that things to you. Beside, I do not have chance to meet you. I knew that what I told you on the phone or text you, you will feels very fake. You will think that my feeling of love to you is not true and not sincere at all. You also think that I have no guts to tell you face to face. But time and my effort that I put will prove everything to you.

Tertiary Education

Yesterday, my mum brought me to some colleges to enquire some courses. The colleges that I been to are Monash University, Sunway College, and the new Taylor College. All this colleges make me very satisfy and happy about it. Besides that, I have nothing to care now except my studies. Since you had already gave me the answer, so I can pay 100% of concentration and effort in my studies. About love story, totally out from my list now in this split second. All the lecturer in those colleges advised me to further my studies at overseas. I still choosing whether I wanna be pilot or businessman. I feels so free now. At the same time, sadness occur in my heart. I hope time can recover me and let it go something that not belongs to me forever. I not gonna look back anymore. Is wasting my time. I wanna graduate in the short period of time if I can. I want to have my own career. I want to buy things myself using my own money. I don't want to depends on my parents. The feeling towards you is still exist. But I need to let it go as fast as possible.

Bored without you

This few days I'm gonna be very bored without you. Even though you bring your phone, but I not sure whether there is a network coverage or not. I hope there is a network coverage so that I can call you and text you all the time. I just don't know how to prove it to you but I trying my very best to tell you that I love you. I just wanna be with you all the time. I don't want you to leave me. I feels very bored and lonely without you. Besides that, my feeling towards will never fade away no matter what. You're just perfect for me. I do admit that sometimes my attitudes gave you the feeling of discomfort. I promised you that it won't happen again. I going to change my attitudes in the shortest period of time. Round-the-clock, I miss you. I keep thinking about you. I just don't know what I doing now is it right or wrong. Am I fall in love in the wrong person? No matter the answer is good or bad, the feeling of mine is still there.

Disappointment

I felt that what I do is making myself disappointed. I made her disappointed. I make everyone disappointed. What can I do now? This few nights I can't sleep at all. My eyes shine brightly to the ceiling and thinking something that can't happen on me. Can anyone teach me? I have no idea how to control my mind. I want to have a good night sleep. Should I consume some sleeping pills to make me sleep? Or someone knock on my head let me faint? Or just commit suicide? No need to think so many things. This world is so unfair. I can't blame anything. I just can blame myself that I still not good enough. Why can't this world be perfect? I just want you to believe. Is it so hard to fulfill? I still remembered what you told me when the first time we met each other. I felt very bored and lonely without you. I have no idea how to overcome this problem. The only way I overcome this problem is text you or call you. My heart is already broken into pieces. I just speechless and feels disappointed.

Farewell

Goodbye my friends,

especially Cornelius and Crystal.

Have a nice day. Take care.

To Where You Are by Josh Groban

Who can say for certain

Maybe you're still here

I feel you all around me

Your memory, so clear

Deep in the stillness

I can hear you speak

You're still an inspiration

Can it be

That you are mine

Forever love

And you are watching over me from up above

Fly me up to where you are

Beyond the distant star

I wish upon tonight

To see you smile

If only for awhile to know you're there

A breath away not far

To where you are

Are you gently sleeping

Here inside my dream

And isn't faith believing

All power can't be seen

As my heart holds you

Just one beat away

I cherish all you gave me everyday

'Cause you are my

Forever love

Watching me from up above

And I believe

That angels breathe

And that love will live on and never leave

Fly me up

To where you are

Beyond the distant star

I wish upon tonight

To see you smile

If only for awhile

To know you're there

A breath away not far

To where you are

I know you're there

A breath away not far

To where you are

--------------------------------------------------------------------

This song is so calm and meaningful. I love it so much after I able to play it on the piano. It is so romantic. This song is from a movie called P.S I Love You. The genre of this movie is romance obviously. Besides that, I got to know this song by my piano teacher. She had taught me since I was young. She guide me all the way and make a changes of me especially my characteristic and attitudes. So far I did not disappoints her in my piano. But I don't feels proud because I know that I can play much more better. I just need some time. Time can prove everything to my teacher and you. I wanna get all distinctions at all the sections. I will try to get full marks if I could. Anyway, back to the song. I like to play this song under a calm and quiet atmosphere especially during midnight. The echoes of that sounds reflects all over my room and forms a romantic environment. Music is really important for me and is a way for me to express my feeling out from my heart. I can't find other way to express my feeling except through my musical instruments. I'm so sorry that you feels so fake. It is very normal. I did not blame you because of this. This is because I used to act at school. This will make you feels that actually what I trying to say whether is true or false. Honestly, I did not try to act in front of you. I just able to clarify everything here. The more I explain, The more you will feels fake and feels like I trying to hide something from you. So I did not like to explain in front of you. This is the reason why I need blog. Because I able to write everything down according to my heart. That's all.

Cyber time

This few days I went out with Lynus and Hong Yaip to cyber cafe where nearby Leisure Mall. Three of us played Call of Duty : Modern Warfare for few hours. It is so fun. Lynus and me keep kill Hong Yaip till he get pissed off. So funny. The way he get pissed off make me laugh. Playing game is one of the way to calm me down and stop me thinking about other things. This is because I just focus on game. The graphic of the game is truly fascinating. Besides that, Steven joined us after that. He keep shouting Hong Yaip's name because Steven was killed by Hong Yaip. All the profanity had came out from Steven's mouth. I felt so funny when he scolded Hong Yaip. Some people in the cyber cafe looking at him. I feels so happy with them even though is just few of us playing game. Time passes really very fast. I hope everyday I can go out with them play games. Next week the game is on again. Haha!!!!

Finally

This SPM examination wakes me up in many aspect especially my life. I able to feels that I no longer the previous Sebastian anymore. And I felt that I had changed . I learnt quite a lot of things this year. I no longer need to wear a mask to face everyone. My true self shall reveals. I need to look forward and will not make any stupid decision without thinking. And I understand that you no longer belongs to me. Our distance had gone very far from each other. But my feeling towards you will never fade away. During this SPM period, I felt myself have no stress at all. I felt very relax. Happy go lucky. I always thinks fail then fail. Not a big deal. I don't really give a damn to that nonsense certificates. This certificates will only can used in this "Tanah Melayu". Apart from that, "Tanah Melayu" is really freaking hot. Today, I became very rebellious to the guard and the receptionist. I need us to get approval from the receptionist to go back home. The school need my parents purposely to travel here to sign the nonsense procedure. This is so impossible. Finally, my friend's parents came to help us. Thanks to him and his parents. My parents had make a very wrong decision to send me to this school that have such a stupid procedure. But I had learnt a lot of things in this school at the same time. I appreciate all my friends around me. But not the stupid, nonsense procedure of the schools. Their procedure and attitudes start to piss me off.  

 

*Relaxing*

The Corundum family

Yesterday, I polished my Sapphire. I felt like long time didn't touch it. I need to get back the soul of my Sapphire. By getting back the soul, I need to put some feeling in to feel the music flowing down deep in my heart. I want this feeling back to me. This feeling is so unforgettable. Same goes to my lovely Pegasus. Pegasus is a combination of all the instruments. Sapphire is a string instrument. Besides that, I had put many effort in these musical instruments. There are just part of my family. Without them, my life gonna be very bored and lonely. Apart from that, I do have lively corundum who leave among us. She is a very lovely, ladylike, polite, good-looking, magnificent girl with full of divinity in her heart. That's the best way to describe her. All my friends have these characteristic that I mentioned above. This is why my friends are always beautiful and lovely one. 

Am I right, my dear friends?

Giving up is the hardest profession in the world

The sky is crying. The atmosphere outside is just similar in my heart. The tears is raining. But I can't do anything on it. I just can wait. If really have chance for us to develop a relationships, I will really appreciate it very much. This love games is too risky for me. I don't dare to invest so much time and effort in the relationships. I wanna have a stable investment in relationships. This can give me a good return if it is stable. The more I invest, the greater the risk I would get hurt. I don't like challenging things. I love things to be stable all the time and have no risk. As a return, It can give me the feeling safe and secure. The person that you always think can be my soulmate is not her. The person I wanted the most to be my soulmate is only you. She is just part of my siblings. I have 0% feeling towards her. I know you will feels that I was lie-ing and feeling of fake occur in your mind. Unfortunately, blogging is the best way to express my feeling here. In here, I have no intention to act. This is because this is my second home. It is not necessary for me to act here. I just giving up to continue loving you. But the feeling will remains the same in my heart. You're the girl that I adore the most in my 17 years of life. You know who you are. I will still love you.

Time

Today is 11th of November 2009. Time passes really fast. Now time is very important for me. Besides that, I miss the Form 4 Commerce 1. When I looked at the class photo of 2008, that year is a year that my brain have nothing just studies. But the class of 2009 have a very big difference compare to class of 2008. I had already study at Cempaka School for two years. I should feels grateful or regret to enter this school. I really don't know which one should I choose. But I should feels thankful to my parents, siblings and my friends. They stayed here because of me. But next year they gonna go back to where they belongs to. When I first enter Cempaka, I really hate the school and the person around me. They are so weird and aggressive sometimes. But the times changes my thinking. Finally, I felt that my friends in the school really important for me. When I saw the name list of Form 5 Commerce 1, I felt sad. This is because all the friends that make me laughed went to Form 5 Commerce 2. Why can't they maintain in Form 5 Commerce 1? Because of their academic performance is weaker than others. So they need to go down. At the same time, I felt happy because get to know new friends. Anyway, everything gonna end at 9th of December 2009. After 9th of December 2009, everyone will enter different colleges and some might wanna enter the World of Unknown. The World of Unknown is full of challengers.  Everybody fight for their survival. Fighting for survival need to sacrifice something no matter what. Maybe it might their relationships, friends, family or life. Nowadays, people are cold-blooded. They can do anything to achieve what they wishes for. For instance, they will kill people because of money or maybe will rape and murder to satisfy themselves. So prepare ourselves to face the new world called The World of Unknown. 

Good Luck..

Vacation

Last night, my parents planning to bring us to go Japan during the Chinese New Year. So fun. I can buy anything I want and eat anything I like. Beside, this year is my last year in the high school. The 10 subjects that I study now can put down completely and enjoy my holiday for next few months. I can travel around with my brother and friends. Play around. Get to know more culture in other country. Drink many types of coffee around the world. And the best part is get to know more Casino around the world. Haha!! After vacation to Japan, I going to request to have a cruise vacation to have maximum excitement. Play until I wanna vomit then come back for my studies. Meaning to say that next year is the real honeymoon year. The longest honeymoon year ever in my 17 years of life. Haha!! My brain keep thinking about vacation now. Can't concentrate on studies. How to face the SPM examination? The best way is keep it aside. Haha!! I think I will consider to do that. That's all for today. 

Good Luck in your life.  

Best Friend Forever :)

Finally, I have the answer from you. And glad to hear that. Actually before that I trying to let it go and don't waste time. The truth is I can really put it down completely. Thank you. But you still my friend no matter what. I had think twice in everything I did. That's all. 

Best Friend Forever.

Testimonial Day Class of 2009

This is the day everybody is waiting for. That is the Graduation day. However, when we heard the word 'graduation', some might think that we gonna lost contact to each other meaning to say that the friendship will end here. For me, once you're my friend, forever you will be my friend. No matter where I go, friendship still in my heart. I always remember the moment we have joy but not sorrow. Yesterday is our last time that we have our gathering party for all the Form 5. This is the most meaningful day for all of us. But I think for all the commerce students I guess we still have chance to gather again. I hope I can have a gathering party again with all the commerce students. Anyway, we still have another prom night. I hope to see all the commerce students during the prom night. I will remember this class of 2009's moment for my entire life. 

Yesterday is a history

My aunt had leave the world for four days. And I already felt sad for four days. But today I can't put it down and accept the reality that my aunt already leave me. I won't be sad anymore. This is her destiny. We can't changes her destiny and brings her back to us. Past means is past. I will not look back. Looking back of the past do not bring me any benefit. Anyway, forget about of those decease. 

Last night, I chat with my parents about my future. Maybe I will further my studies at overseas. But one things I worry about is you. I promise you I will come back and pay a visit to you. I mean what I said. I won't forget you no matter what. Your name will carve in my heart and remember you for eternity. The feeling of loving you and missing you can make me feels you always by my side and to support me always. 

I love you forever.

My Guardian Angel

Life is just a cycle for human beings. My auntie just passed away last night because she has cancer. She is such a kind-hearted person but why the God need to give her such a disease. It is so unfair. I really very sad and moody when I received this news from my parents. Yesterday I scolded my brother terribly. And he just kept quiet because he knew that I in bad mood. Last night, I went to my auntie's house for pray. Many taoists came to her house and gave my auntie blessing so that she can rest in peace (R.I.P). My tears just flowed down from my eyes when I saw her lying down there. I really can't accept it that she just left me and a piece a letter for me. One of her wishes I can't fulfill it. I think she gonna be very disappointed. I'm so sorry. She really very love me although I always be playful but she still protect me and willing to forgive me. I felt very happy when I with my auntie. When I was young, she used to bring me to go shopping. What I can say now is just a word, SAD.

You

Do you know you very important for me? I wanna hold your arm forever if I can. I won't let it go no matter what. This is because you're the person that I adore the most in my life. I will love you compassionately. You're the one who make me have the extensive feeling. Without you, the time just passes freaking slow. I really don't know what to do. I don't want anybody to hurt you. For me, you're just a quintessential girl. I just don't know how to express my feeling to you. But it is real. No matter where I go, what I do, the feeling of missing you is exist in my mind every second, every minutes and every hour. 

I love you.

The vindication of myself to you.

I can be myself when I'm with you.

Your idea of romance is dim light, soft music, and just the two of us.

Because you make me feel like, like I have never felt before.

I can tell you anything, and you won't be shocked.

Your undying faith is what keeps the flame out of love alive.

You and me together, we can make magic.

Thinking of you, fills me with wonderful feeling.

Your love gives me the feeling, that the best is still ahead. 

You are simply irresistible.

I love you because you bring the best out of me.

Your terrific sense of humor.

You're the one who holds the key of my heart.

You always say what I need to hear. 

You have taught me the true meaning of love.

Love is, what you mean to me - and you mean everything. 

You are my theme of dream. 

I have had the time of my life and I owe it all to you.

Your love to me is a natural anti-depressant. 

I love to hear your voice.

Your love has helped me to rediscover myself. 

Your love is an effective antidote to despair.

You always make me feel that you are by my side no matter what.

I love the way you keep your cool when I do something stupid. 

Just being with you feels like I can defy the whole world.

You mean the world to me.  

Tactile Sense

I felt very uneasy when I didn't text you for few days. I really not used to it. But I know time can change everything. But for me I don't think so. I already depends on you for many months. I can't find anybody to share about my things. Usually I shared with you no matter is happiness or sorrow. I hope everything back to last time. We laughed together, joke together and play together. Every time I wanted to text you but I don't dare to do it. Just left with the last step the message will be sent. But I did not press the button. I can't really put it down. The time passes very slow without you. I have no idea why it will happen on me. What I do just can't concentrate at all.

Gaming School

Tomorrow I feels like want to absent because I don't want to see unnecessary person that affect my mood. I can feels like something bad gonna happen tomorrow if I go to school tomorrow. I hope my feeling is wrong. I hope my brother will give me permission for not attending the school tomorrow. Anyway, today I went to school because I want to play game with my bunch of friends. Play Counter-Strike Source. Boys VS Girls. It is so nice and fun and funny. But one of the girl like to scream. Sometime she make people feels very uncomfortable and rebellious to her. Once she got killed, then she will start to scream. I really want to stitch her mouth so that she can keep quiet. She make me feels very annoying. Some of my friends sit beside her gonna be deaf one day. Her voice is really keen. But finally she went back to her class. The decibels in our class decreases tremendously.  Next time she scream again. I gonna scold with all those profanity and kick her out from the class. Anyway, I need to stop here and pray hard to get good news from my brother.

Pray Hard!!!!!

Happy moments with you guys.

I very happy to be with you and feels very comfortable. Finally, I can let it go the things that is not belong to me. Rachel, you make me feels that you're the person that I should appreciate forever. I bring me smile but not sorrow. After my SPM, we gonna have plenty of time to accompany each other. I hope we just go overseas for vacation with Crystal and Cornelius, the lovely couple. And some of my friends in Switzerland (Samuel, Bernard, Stephanie, Dominic, Christopher, Raven, Emily). This is my gang that always have fun with me at overseas. After my SPM, Switzerland gonna be in winter season. Is the best time to have ski. All my friends is waiting for my arrival to Switzerland especially Dominic and Christopher. I going to back very very soon. After my prom night, I gonna be back with you guys. And halloween is coming. Too bad I can't celebrate with you guys at overseas. After this year, I gonna celebrate with you guys every year. I not gonna miss a single chance. 

Happy Halloween!!!

The place where we start and the place where we end

I going to graduate soon. Maybe I will lost contact with some of my friends because they went overseas to further their studies. Sometimes I felt maybe I also part of the one who will lost contact with all my friends. But don't worry. We can keep contact each other in our blog. So that we know what's going on in our daily routine. By the time, I graduate I not sure that whether I have to time to update my blog or not. But I will online all the time. So we won't lost contact to each other. But sometimes the place where we know each other meaning to say that the place where we will ends. I hope our friendships is endless. No matter where I go, friendships will in my heart. This is because friends is forever for me. They help me when I face difficulties and advice me when I did somethings wrong, play with me when I feel bored and many more. I can't list all out. Because it is uncountable. But something I should end it after I graduate is to forget everything sadness that I been through. 

Best Friends Forever!!

Endless Exam

Finally, I finish my trial exam. But I still feels that the exam is approaching again that is my SPM. 41 days to go. This countdown really drive me crazy and make me feels very stress. And I will try my best to achieve good results so that my teachers will not disappointed. Some of the teachers had put many hope and effort on us especially my economy teacher, Puan Anita. She is my favorite teacher among all the teachers. Even though most of the teachers are giving up but she is not. She still encourage us and have hope on us. For all those teacher that already give up, my heart will much more relieved. This is because you already give up. If I achieve A's in all those subjects which teacher had already give up, I not going to say thank you because you are giving up. I will only say thank you to my parents, my friends around me, and my economy teacher. For my account, if I really achieve A, I also will not say thank you because you taught me nothing and you always make me down and pissed off all the time. If you really know that I have no potential to obtain an A, please do advise me to drop your subject so you will not have any burden on me. Luckily I do have a mother that know accounts and much more better than you. I learnt account and show improvement because of my mother not you. So don't feels proud when I obtain A in account. 

Random

I going to get my "L" license this coming weekend. I must pass the exam no matter what. I need to go out all by myself and have fun with my friend especially you. I can't wait the time that I drive. Even though is a old junk car but I not really mind about car. Maybe some people will think that car represents their status. For me is totally bullshit. Anyway, I felt very happy that I able to control my mood. Is really unbelievable. This is because last night I really very angry at someone. Some of my friends know who is that person. Tomorrow I taking the paper. I hope I not facing her when I doing the paper. If I face her face, my paper going to fail. Because I going to leave with blank to fulfill her wish. That want to be to get 0% for the paper. Dreams come true. For me, she just piece of shit. So don't care about her. 

Second, I felt like want to continue chasing the things that I wish for. I can't really treat you bad because my mind don't allow me to do that on you. You are my angel of my life. You always make me smile when I was sad and reminds me a lot of things that I shouldn't do. Thank you so much. 

Thirdly, I need to concentrate on my piano exam after the SPM examination. I must get the highest post in the course. Although, I not taking music course but I still to collect all the certificate to make them have 'family reunion'. Haha!! And I going to take my Forecast results to register Monash University at Subang Jaya. Hope I can get a good results. Pray hard.

That's all for today. 

Fuck you o0o

You made me very pissed off today. Today after my Sejarah paper, I went to find Puan Roslina, not finding you such an asshole, dumbass, idiot, motherfucker, pathetic humans that leave on earth, emotional and pork head. I don't really like your attitude that you face to teacher and students. You make us feels hatred. I bet many people really want to screw you up after SPM. I can tell you that you totally rubbish for me. You taught me nothing, BITCH. I have no fear on you such a bitch. Although, your age is much more older than me, old folks. Besides that, you want to give me 0% for my accounts paper. Just go ahead, BITCH. Who cares about your fucking account paper? Wish for 100% clear pass in your subject. In your dreams, bitch. Don't ever try to think that you have the greatest power on the earth. Frankly speaking, you're not at all. I feels want to slap your face and hang you upside down to cut you into pieces. Who you think you are? You just a ordinary human who is a bitch or maybe worse than a bitch. Did your mother teaches you how to respect people? You want people to respect you. First of all, you need to know how respect others. Understand, bitch??????

I hate you to the maximum, SON OF THE BITCH...............

Monday, 5th of October.

First of all, I need to wish my dear friend, Ivin, a very happy birthday for her. She received many presents today. She received a purse from the brand Coach. After that, she screamed very damn loud. Besides that, her voice is really very sharp. I gonna deaf if she continue screaming. 

Second, is my exam. Today is my Perdagangan paper. I didn't really study for this subject. But after Paper 1, I study a little before the paper 2 start at 1.30 p.m. I felt that I'm so lucky. So coincidence that what I study just now, its came out during the exam. I hope I can score an A for this paper. I don't want to make my teacher disappointed again. 

That's all for today.

Overseas

Just now, I asked my dad that I would like travel after my SPM examination. Then he agree. Now, my feeling is really very happy and desperate. Few more weeks later, I gonna meet the airplane and fly around. I so enjoy when I heard that I can go overseas for vacation. I just can't wait for the moment to go overseas. 

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mooncake Festival

First of all, I need to say thank you to Pui Yee for your sincerity invitation to your beautiful house for celebrate Mooncake Festival. Last night, I tried two new things that I never done before in my life such as walking while holding a red lantern and celebrating Mooncake Festival at my friend's house. Besides that, holding a red lantern while walking under the shady tree with some drizzling rain on my head is quite scary. Apart from that, my friend, Pui Yee, told me many spooky things that happened before near her beautiful house. At the same time, I felt very curious to all those spooky things. Anyway, just forget about this. And last night I got to know a new brand called BABY MILO. For me, this brand is really new because I never heard before. The brand really very funny. "Baby Milo". Why not "Baby Nescafe" or "Baby Horlick"? Why must "Baby Milo"? Haha!!!!....... After that, we played some games inside the Karaoke room. I not really sure what is all about at first. But finally I understand and while playing this game I felt very sleepy and tired.  After that, everyone dismiss at 11.00 o'clock sharp except me and Michael Lee. While waiting for my dad, I chat with Michael and Pui yee. Both of them is a good partner to chat. Haha!! Because they very socialize with each other. Good for them and me. 

Which words is suitable to describe about this party?

A.) Happy

B.) Sad

C.) Bored

D.) Tiring

My answer is not here because my answer is beyond that limit.

 How about yours?

Feeling

The feeling inside my heart is really unique. And I felt this feeling going to be deeper and deeper. Only you will understand. No one knows about it. I know something is very fake. But I try my best to tell you something with my sincerity to you. I willing to sacrifice anything for you including my time. I just want you to be happy. I will try my very best to accompany you when you feels depress or moody. No matter is in the middle of night or what. I just want you to be happy. But I do feels very comfortable when I chat with you. Because I willing to share everything with you and you willing to share your things with me. This make me feels very grateful to have you. I always control myself not to think about you. But I can't do that. My mind keep on thinking about you. Sometimes feelings is really hard to control and is beyond my control. So I just don't want to see sorrow in your heart. But I want to see happiness in your heart and soul. 

Happy Birthday to myself

Yesterday is my birthday. I got presents and surprises from my friends. First of all, I need to say thank you to all my friends especially Ruby, Pui Yee, Steven and Hong Yaip. They wishes me happy birthday. I felt that is the greatest presents already. I don't really hope for presents. Haha!! I celebrated three times in a day. First time is at 12.00 midnight on 30th of September. Second time is at school. Three time is at my house during at night. My parents bought my favorite ice cream cake from Haagen Dazz. It is really delicious and flavorful. My parents gave me a big presents and hug. Apart from that, my brothers gave me a BlackBerry phone as my presents. I love it so much. Thank you to all of them. This is the moment that I enjoyed so much with my family and friends. I appreciate them so much. This is because they let me feels the true meaning love and friendships in my life. 

Apart from my birthday, something do happened on 30th of September. That is an earthquake that happened at Sumatra, Indonesia. Hope they gonna be fine and everything will goes smoothly to them. Yesterday, my princess, asked me did I feel any vibration or not? I replied her, no. I thought is people's illusion or imagination. But is true. This really happened at Indonesia. I felt so guilty that I said is fake news. So sorry about it. Hope this will not lasts long. 

 

Happy Birthday and God Bless Them..... 

Without you

My tears are flowing for you,

As my mind wonders and heart beats,

My body is nothing without you.

And as the wetness of my cheek are beginning to dry, 

And my thoughts weaken and try to forget,

I feels like nothing without you.

The beats within my chest were real,

Something that no one will ever steal,

When there is nothing without you.

But as I try to forget you more and more,

My body grows weaker and begins to wear,

Mind floats, rises to react.

I know I'm nothing without you.

A relaxing day

The Swimming Pool The Sutera Harbour Yacht Club The luxury yacht The breath-taking view from my room The Living room Rafflesia Flower The flower outside the house The Lobby Beach-side

All those pictures I took with my handphone. This handphone really sucks. I forgot to bring my camera. Because I don't really like to take pictures when I go somewhere. But this time got different. Maybe my friend influenced me. This few days I went to Sabah to relax myself. Actually I should go somewhere where is really far from Malaysia. But unfortunately my parents change their decision. Besides that, my uncle persuade us to go there to have fun with them. But I really enjoy the moment with them. I went to many places with them. I felt like no stress when I with them. We went to clubhouse to drink wine, dance, sing, shout as loud as we want. The clubhouse not open for everyone. That clubhouse only open for certain V.I.P. Luckily my uncle is the V.I.P. So we can go in to experiences the Sabah's clubhouse. It is so relax and fun. I get to know many friends here. Most of them are from royal family. But they very friendly and sociable. So I can easily get to know them. Some of them from Dubai and some of them from european country. I gonna have chance to meet them again during the Chinese New Year. I don't really want to talk that much. So I end here. 

Another Disappointment

Today I got back my mathematics results and my economy objective marks. It is really very very disappointed and meaningless. What happen to my mathematics? I'm chinese. I must get A for mathematics. Chinese should good in calculation. But I get 60++ for my maths. It is so shame. I want A for my Maths please. I done a lot of practice for my maths. Why can't I get a better results? Everyone said practice makes perfect. Is totally bullshits. I don't believe anything now. I believe to myself only. I done so many practice the results is still the same. I rather give up. I don't want to forced myself. Sometimes I really don't know what happens to me. Sometimes feels very confident sometimes feels very nervous and scared. I really felt like somethings goes wrong with me.

1st day of exam

Today is my first day of exam. I have no idea why the mathematics is so complicated. I hope I can score A for maths. But English. Maybe it could make my lovely sister very disappointed. This is because Mr.Alphonsus will not set easy questions for us and he marks very strict especially grammar. This drives me crazy. I don't want to fail my English for this SPM Trial. I felt tired to see red light shining on my paper especially English and History. And the red color make me so depress sometimes when I think about it. I should score better than that because I had such a wonderful teacher that always told us "Life is Beautiful". All the teacher around me is totally awesome except one of the teacher is really useless for me. I learn nothing in that class. Luckily my brother guide me all the way. If not, I really have no idea how to done well in that subject. I had promised my brother that I will achieve good results this time. I don't want to break my promise. I never break my promise before in my life. So this time the promise that promise that I make is quite hard to fulfill but I will try my best. 

Good Luck to all Form 5 especially my lovely sister!!!!

The Warfare

Currently, I preparing for the war on coming Tuesday. This war is very meaningful because I need to apply 11 years knowledge that I learnt. This gonna be a very difficult war to fight for. And this war going to last for a month. Most of my friends is preparing for this war too. This is because they care about it very much. Apart from that, this results can lead us to the college that we want to enter. I hope that the results that I get can satisfied my brother and my parents. I don't want to disappointed them again. This is my last chance to proof to them that I can do it although I in commerce class. And commerce student do have a very bright future that waiting them. And commerce students and science student are equal. Commerce students can also be very successful. Besides that, even though during the form 3 their public examination is not good but this doesn't mean they have no future. That is already a history. Don't ever look down at commerce students. 

p/s : Yesterday is a history, Today is a gift and Tomorrow is a mystery........

SPM Trial Examintion

This few days I was playing with my mac and Playstation 3. I not really prepare for my trial yet. I wonder when I gonna start the revision seriously. Most probably this Friday I going to take this seriously. I need to start the revision. Although I do spend a few hours everyday but the Trial is around the corner. I prefer study with my friends so we can exchange our opinion. I looking forward this friday to have group study with my classmate. I hope every single of my friends can score every subject that they take. But I'm sure many of friends had started their revision during the holiday. They are hardworking. But I still fooling around and playing game. I following my brother when he was 17 years old. But his results make me randomly speechless. And I know I not that brilliant like both of my brothers. So I must used hard work to achieve good results. Besides that, my Trial is on next Tuesday. 5 more days to go. Really nervous....

Dinner with my relatives.

Yesterday I went to Leisure Mall to have group study with my friends. Amir study with us. Frankly speaking, we played more than we study. I learnt how to play Para Para Paradise. The arcade game quite interesting. At the same time, I exercising. After that, we dismiss at 5.00 o'clock. My lovely mother fetch me home. After 10 minutes when I reach my home sweet home, my father brought my relatives to gather at my house. Then my father asked them to take dinner with us. So we went to The Garden to have dinner. The dinner is really very delicious. Actually my dad already planned to have dinner with them today. So he already bought a room. We can see the night scenery from the room. Besides that, got a huge LCD television in the room. But my relatives watched Mr Bean. I forced to watch but the shows quite stupid and funny. I laughed like nobody business. Some of them even hug each other and laughed. Is really ridiculous. I hope everyday can have such a dinner with them. I enjoyed the dinner with them. I looking forward to have another dinner with them.

Jaguar XF

Finally my father trade in the car and change a new Jaguar XF. This is what I hope for. Finally my dreams come true. Unfortunately, the car is not in my house now. This is a sports sedan car. This car launched in U.K last year. I love this car very much. Once this car reach my house, I gonna calls my brother bring me to have a ride at KL. This gonna be fun. And I also wish test drive on it. I can't wait for the moment. Hehe!!! I hope next time when I get my driving license I got chance to drive once in a while. 

Anyway, Thanks to my dad!!!

Loneliness

This few days I can't sleep well. I don't know what happen to me. I know that I need to sleep but I can't. This is torturing me. Should I consume sleeping pill to make me sleep soundly? Sometimes I do feel scared of the trial. This is because yesterday what my teacher asked me. I can't answer any questions that proposed from my teacher. I have 10 subjects that I need to master it. I just feels very tired and depressed sometimes. Why suddenly my life become so dull? My life should be full of entertainment and happiness. But now I lacked of everything that I should have. What I should do? Some of my best friends already went back to Europe. I felt lonely without them. I miss the moment that we had together past few months. The atmosphere is really different without them. My room gonna lack of sounds, laughter, joy, happiness and excitement. The atmosphere in my room now is totally dull.

Sri Aman Damansara's Haunted Toilet

I’m not really the kind of person that always experience any ghost or haunting. Not especially when this incident happened still left me feeling doubtful about it. Til this day, the sounds I heard is still clear in my mind although it was already past 2 years. It happened in a very early morning. Me and my sister have decided to go for some international marathon run that was organized every year. Without fail we would join the run just for the fun of it. Since I was staying in OUG, I would drive to my sister’s place at Sri Aman, Damansara where the location of the run held was nearer to her place. This year, however, was slightly different. Herfriend decided to join us and since she could not drive, the plan was me driving to my sister’s place then we would car pool to her friend’s house in Kepong.

The plan was going accordingly when upon reaching my sister’s friend’s house my dear sister realized that she forgot to bring her running shoes. Thinking that we still had the time, my sister decided to head back to her house to get her stuff. When we reached Sri Aman’s condominium, me and her friend waited at the car while she took the lift and came back with her shoes. As we were driving out to the guard house, I had a sudden urge to go to  the toilet. My sister suggested that I could take a lift up to her house since it was nearby but I thought that it was pretty troublesome since I had to wait for the lift and such. Then my sister suggested to use the toilet located near the swimming pool. I agreed and she stopped nearby.

The toilet had only 2 cubicles, one for the guys and one for the ladies. The toilet for the guys was on the right whereas the toilet on the left are for the ladies. Behind the toilet was some sort of storage area and since it was still early, the place was quite dark. I turned on the lights and headed for the ladies. To tell you the truth, I’m the kind that’s pretty particular about the cleanliness of a toilet and since the toilet was the sitting kind, I thought the better of it and decided to step on the toilet bowl instead.

As soon I as put my right leg on the toilet bowl, I heard someone to my right shouting “Ooi!”. The voice was deep and sounded much like a man’s voice. I was quickly stunned and stopped short putting my left right back on the ground. But since I was already on a super urge to go toilet I didn’t care. This time, I climbed onto the toilet bowl and release myself. In the middle of business, again I heard someone to my right shouting “Ooi!” only this time it was louder and clearer. Goosebumps on the back of my hair raised and I quickly finished my business. At that point of time, I thought that it could be someone at the guys toilet but common sense told me that was impossible since it was still very early in the morning (approximately 4am).

As I ran towards my sister’s car, I glanced behind to take a peek hoping that it was really someone but there was no one at the guys toilet and it toilet was still vacant. In the car, I asked my sister if anyone went to toilet besides me but both she and her friendconfirmed that there wasn’t a soul to be seen. Only me. Now, I can only wonder if my action of stepping on the toilet bowl offended them.

Taman Desa Hospital is haunted

One day, a lady (could say she looked quite the rich and fussy type) admitted into the bed next to mine. At night as usual, the noises of children playing and laughing started and it went on the whole night. The next morning, the lady grumbled of lack of sleep due to the noises down at the lobby. Again, that very night, the noises started again. This time, the lady could not take it anymore and even asked me if I was bothered by noises. I simply shrugged because to tell the truth, I was already used to it. The lady then called the nurse attending the night shift and scolded her for not keeping the children’s voices low. The nurse simply replied she could not hear a thing but the lady insisted that the nurse was lying. It wasn’t until the next morning another day shift nurse told her that there was nothing they could do because these are ghost children.

Another encounter I had was when I was just admitted into the Taman Desa Hospital. At one time, I was awaken by an old man standing visiting my bed neighbour. Every day I could see him standing there smiling at me when I noticed him but he never spoke a word to the person he was visiting. That evening, my girlfriend was sleeping soundly by my bedside when I was suddenly awaken. As usual, I saw the old man and smiled back at him. This time around, he spoke to me. We chatted for a while until the old man told me he had to leave. We said our goodbyes and he left. My girlfriend woke up and asked me who I was talking to and I told her about the old man that always visited my bed neighbour. She looked at me with a funny look and asked me who I was talking about. She could not see any old man at all. I never saw the old man again, though.